


Swords, Rags, And Boots

by TheSleepyOne



Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
Genre: Angst, Based on a Tumblr Post, Belief mention of injury, Blood and Violence, Canon-Typical Violence, Description of blood, Drabble, F/M, Hurt No Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Language, Minor Violence, Multi, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:55:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27076855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSleepyOne/pseuds/TheSleepyOne
Summary: Enough is enough. The prank war has gone on for weeks and Lambert has yet to get back on you. You’ve been on edge for days, constantly looking over your shoulder. It's driving you insane. Then he finally strikes when you’re most valuable.
Relationships: Eskel & Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Lambert (The Witcher)/Reader
Kudos: 18





	Swords, Rags, And Boots

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: @queenxxxsupreme wrote a lovely fic about having a prank war with Lambert and I thought it was so cute. This is a continuation of that in a sense so I recommend you read her’s first. Beta read by the awesome @cherry-witchx 
> 
> https://queenxxxsupreme.tumblr.com/post/632055120584114176/hi-if-you-end-up-doing-fluffy-asks-for-lambert-i

It's been days and you haven’t had a good night's sleep in what seems like ages. Lambert could strike at any moment in time and he knew exactly what he was doing to you. 

Every time the two of you would pass in the hallways he gave you a look that just told you of all the things he was planning. None of them were any good. 

Eskel and Geralt were of little to no help. Those traitors had switched sides and were working for Lambert now. You were alone, not wanting to get Vesemir involved in the battles. 

“Where are you going?” you asked Lambert one morning after a sleepless night. 

“No where….” He gave you that look again, as if he were up to something. He was taunting you, baiting you but you couldn’t help but fall for it. And so you followed him. Or tried to. With his witcher sense he could hear where you were at all times but it was the thought that counts. 

Trailing behind him through the winding halls you end up in the courtyard. Geralt and Eskel were already there and though it should have set off some sort of alarm in your head, you thought nothing of it. You just continued to keep your distance while still being able to see Lambert. 

He swung his hips just so as he grabbed his sword, giving you a wink as he joined his brothers. Now was really not the time to be blushing like an idiot but you couldn’t help it. 

“Ready?” Geralt asked the two witchers bringing your attention back to Lambert. That was when you realized that they weren’t practicing with training swords, all three of them had their silver swords in hand. What were they planning? To cut each other to pieces and toss the remains onto your bed?

They nodded and Eskel threw the first strike for Lambert’s neck. He brought his own sword to block but you were already out of your hiding spot, stealth be damned. The three traded blows, the sounds of metal sliding against each other making your heartbeat in your ear. 

You’ve seen them train before, it was hard to take your eyes off of them when they did. Their sweat soaked clothing, the grunts and groans, so enticing yet when they begin discarding their clothing you have no choice but to turn away. That is when they train with their own fists or with training weapons, not the ones used on the trail. 

“Lambert, should you really be using those weapons?” you asked, concern getting to you. 

“What-” 

The blow was so quick and so hard you wouldn’t think that Lambert could’ve dodged it. Eskel’s blade sliced the right side of Lambert’s in one foul swing. It extended from his forehead down to his chin and was a hair from his neck. Blood quickly began trickling down the side of his face and you rushed over to him.

“What the fuck, Eskel?!” 

The witcher dropped his sword and ran to his brother’s aid. “Sorry, I should’ve given you time to block.” He traced Lambert’s wound, careful to avoid irritating it. 

“I told you to knock me down not knock me out!” 

“Wait you told him to hit you?!” you yelled at your witcher, hitting his shoulder exasperated. “What kind of shit were you trying to pull!?” 

“All is fair in the war of love and pranks- Hey what was that for?” This time Geralt hit Lambert over the head, tossing the younger man a rag. 

“You’re lucky Eskel didn’t kill you.” 

“You agreed to it!” 

You looked over to Geralt and Eskel and after meeting your glare they lower their heads in shame. “You two agreed to kill him for what? A prank!” You grab the rag that Geralt had thrown and slapped them with it. “What part of this is funny?” 

“At least he’s matching with Eskel now.” That earned Geralt another slap with the rag. 

“Unbelievable.” 

“And having me hanging from the ceiling by my foot was completely safe?” 

“YES! Because I was there to help you if anything went wrong and you’re a witcher. A three feet drop wouldn’t have killed you but a sword through your thick empty skull will!”

Geralt and Eskel chuckled at your comment. You gave them another glare promising hell. “You’re sleeping alone tonight,” you pointed at Lambert. “And I’m taking Lil’Bleater with me,” this was directed at Eskel who looked like his eyes were about to pop out of their socket.

Then you pointed at Geralt who raised his hands up, “What did I do?”

“You’re an accomplice so I’m taking your bed. You can go sleep with Lambert with the horses.” 

“You can’t make me sleep with him.” 

Reaching down you pulled your boot off your foot, “I can assure you I can.”


End file.
